I have never been one to worry about what everyone else thinks. I live my life the way that I want and do things that make me happy, and have always believed that the way that I live my life will dictate the people that I choose to be friends with. I have also believed that if I am a good person, and live my life trying to serve and make others happy, then I will in return receive blessings.
Recently, I have been faced with a big dilemma in my life, so to speak. I am newly 25-years-old, and have a pretty dang good life if I do say so myself. I consider myself extremely lucky and wake up happy most mornings. I have a great family, fantastic friends, and am receiving an excellent education and am on my way to being able to support myself.
While I was thinking about how I don’t care what other people think, I was faced with an inward dilemma, and thought that I truly do care what others think. The thing is though, I don’t care what strangers think, I care about what my close friends and family think. I would never want to do something that would make others “judge” me or think of me differently, OR anything that would cause someone to *gasp* be mad at me for any reason.
So this dilemma that I speak of, could cause all of the above. It could cause people to think of me differently, it could cause them to judge me, and it could even cause them to potentially be mad at me. The thing is though, the reason for their angst would cause me true and complete happiness. I have been faced with whether or not to tell my friends and family about this inward dilemma that I have been having, and as I have slowly been easing into talking about it, I have certainly received mixed reactions. I wish that I could scream and yell off the top of a mountain that I am not changing, and that I am the same person, but there is just something that I am adding into my life that is making me a much better person, and is creating true happiness within me. I need to learn that I need to do things for ME every once in awhile, and stop caring about “what everyone else thinks.” I am me, this is my life, and this is what I want. I hope that everyone can understand.
It is truly hard for me to write and post this post, but it has a lot of meaning to me. A lot of you might not know what the heckers I am talking about, but that is okay. I needed to write this, and I am happy I did!